After waffling most of the summer, I finally committed to going back for my high school reunion in Minnesota, crossing a pair of time zones and spending too much time in airports (Phoenix, really??) to get there — but that was the price of delaying, which is my own fault. And while there, why not go see a Twins game at new Target Field? So I made arrangements with a friend, N, to go see a game, and hoped to be able to buy tickets online but simply mail them to her home in a suburb of Minneapolis. (more…)
Archive for the ‘humor’ Category
There’s a vast continent-sized island of plastic debris floating in the Pacific. Meanwhile, the polar bears are drowning in the Arctic for lack of ice floes. I suppose it would be prohibitively expensive, but what if we could fuse a lot of that Pacific debris into plastic floes cast adrift in the Arctic for the desperate bears to clamber up on and catch their breath?
So I mentioned the ferret-faced woman in my last post, and how a month or so went by until I saw her again.
When I got on at Civic Center this time, someone was in the window seat next to the chair I usually go for, so I sat an aisle back. The train got crowded quickly after that, and I noticed an elderly couple looking for seats together; they might have been Indian immigrants. They hesitated by that open aisle seat before passing me by. Just then I saw ferret-face get on the train, looking for her best opportunity.
Behind me I heard a woman offer a seat to someone, and then an Indian-accented voice politely decline. Ferret-face passed me by, then began demanding someone move.
The missus and I are going to Florida again. She’s very excited about the trip. Last night she dreamt the two of us were in Florida and had spotted a beautiful woodpecker in a tree, and that we were watching the woodpecker circling the tree, hammering away at it, extracting amazing bugs from under the bark. Then she woke up.
It was the early 90s and I was a victim of the economic downturn. The partnership that had employed me went through three rounds of layoffs and I got the heave-ho in the second, which in retrospect was among the greatest annoyances.
It’s bad enough to get picked for jury duty while still getting paid. I was on jury duty while on unemployment. Further, a couple weeks earlier I had been mugged. Mid-afternoon, what I thought was a jogger approaching from behind, a stiletto in the back of my left thigh and shoved headfirst into a car hard enough to scrape paint from the car onto a lens of my glasses. I blacked out, and came to as my back pocket was being shredded for the $40 – 45 in my wallet. (more…)